Know Where You’re Going

Not everything deserves your time, energy, or attention.

Being Busy Isn't the Same as Moving Forward

I've always been quite goal-oriented.

I knew I wanted to live in Amsterdam. I knew I wanted to start my own business, do more with social media, and study applied psychology.

I've always had things I wanted to work towards.

But that doesn't mean I've never felt lost.

There have been periods in my life when I wasn't entirely sure what I wanted next. And during those times, I noticed how easily I gave my time and energy to things that, looking back, weren't really worth it.

And I think that's something we don't talk about enough.

You can be incredibly busy without actually moving in a direction that matters to you.

When you don't have a clear sense of where you're going, it's easy to get distracted by whatever comes your way.

And that's one of the reasons I believe having goals is so important.

Not because every second of your life needs to be productive.

But because knowing what matters to you helps you recognize what doesn't.

A Goal Gives You Direction

In psychology, Goal-Setting Theory, developed by Edwin Locke and Gary Latham, explains how specific, challenging goals can help direct our attention, effort, and persistence, especially when we're committed to them.

And that makes sense when you think about it.

When you know what you're working towards, it becomes easier to make decisions.

You can ask yourself whether the things you're investing your energy in are bringing you closer to the life you want to create.

And sometimes, the answer will be no.

Of course, life isn't only about achieving things. Rest, relationships, and enjoying the present matter just as much.

But having a direction helps you make more conscious choices.

And there's something else I find important about having a goal.

Life doesn't always go according to plan.

Sometimes things happen that you never expected. Things that disappoint you, hurt you, or temporarily turn your world upside down.

A goal won't make those experiences disappear. But when you're ready to move forward again, having something meaningful to work towards can give you a sense of direction.

A goal doesn't guarantee that life will go according to plan. It gives you a reason to keep moving when it doesn't.

But Do You Actually Want It?

Here's where I want you to think a little deeper.

Because having a goal is one thing.

Having a goal that genuinely comes from within you is another.

In psychology, Self-Determination Theory, developed by Edward Deci and Richard Ryan, distinguishes between different qualities of motivation.

Sometimes we do things because we enjoy them. Sometimes because they reflect our personal values. And sometimes because we feel pressure to prove something, gain approval, or meet other people's expectations.

The more a goal feels personally meaningful and self-endorsed, the more it can support a sense of autonomy.

And I think you can often feel that difference.

A goal that genuinely matters to you feels connected to who you are and the life you want to live.

It's not just about having something impressive to show for your efforts.

So I want you to ask yourself:

Would I still want to do this if I wasn't getting paid for it?

If I received a million euros tomorrow, what would I still want to spend my time doing?

These questions aren't perfect tests. Financial security matters, and there's nothing wrong with wanting to earn money.

But they can help you look beyond the reward and discover what actually interests you.

Because sometimes we're so focused on what achieving a goal will give us that we forget to ask whether we even want the life that comes with it.

Turn Your Direction Into Action

Now, knowing what you want is important.

But knowing what you want won't automatically get you there.

You need to translate that bigger goal into practical steps.

Psychologist Peter Gollwitzer's research on implementation intentions shows that making specific plans about when and how to act can help people follow through on their intentions.

For example, wanting to start your own business is a goal.

Deciding to spend two hours every Saturday developing your business idea is a concrete action.

One gives you direction. The other helps you move.

And I think people sometimes make the mistake of believing they need to know exactly how everything will work out before they begin.

You don't.

You need to know where you want to go, why it matters to you, and what your next step could be.

The rest becomes clearer as you move.

Find Your Direction

I want you to take a moment to think about the life you're creating.

Not the life that looks impressive to other people. The life you genuinely want to wake up to.

You don't need to have your entire future figured out.

Your goals can change as you grow. And sometimes discovering what you don't want is part of finding out what you do.

But don't underestimate the importance of having something meaningful to work towards.

Because becoming her isn't just about imagining a different version of yourself.